When our children hug us or ask us to hug them they want to remind us that they love us but also to tell us something equally important.
What lies behind a embrace? It seems like a trivial question because at first glance the hug is simply a manifestation of affection, however beautiful and profound. But baby hugs sometimes hide coded messages.
Because children do not know how to verbalize emotions like adults, who have learned to do so growing up. For children, joy, fear, fear, discomfort also pass through gestures and among these, hugs.
So when our child looks for us for a hug, when we feel he needs it, it may be that he is communicating something to us. It could be pure happiness or in other cases, fear, discomfort, sadness, all emotions that, especially in this period of quarantine, could manifest themselves more often.
It is no coincidence that many mothers, during the coronavirus emergency, have noticed in their children an unexpected return of the "mammite", which is not accidental but reveals a need for protection heightened by the uncertainty of the current situation.
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It so happens that normally autonomous and safe children have started chasing mom and dad everywhere asking for more attention than usual. It is not boredom but a need for reassurance in a moment of profound change, which children perceive on an emotional level, regardless of the words.
But why do you hug them and not something else? Because in the first 10 years of life, the space in the arms of mum and dad is sacred. Like a safe place to return to, like a nest full of warmth and affection ready to welcome those in need.
Here then for our children that inviolable space is the most suitable place to express their emotional needs during an explosion of joy as well as in a moment of great despair.
What we can do as parents is not to deny them this space and not to scold them if they suddenly show mammon, but to welcome them with patience and generosity.
Of course, it's not easy to balance everything but being present is important. It can be done, if the time available is short, involving them, for example, in our activities, letting them assist us during the carrying out of certain tasks or in the preparation of meals. It's a way to make them feel close, welcomed, loved… and safe.
You might also like:
- 10 benefits of a hug
- Babies need 12 hugs a day to grow up happy and smart
- The wheel of emotions to tell children about their feelings
- How to help children to better express and manage emotions
- Coronavirus: How to reduce anxiety and manage stress for adults and children. WHO advice
