The law of the mirror: what you see in others is your reflection

Who I am
Elia Tabuenca García
@eliatabuencagarcia

What we consider annoying in a person is just the defect that we also have and the same goes for the merits. Here is summarized in a few words the law of the mirror: what you see in others is your reflection.

Don't store avocado like this: it's dangerous

What we consider annoying in a person is just the defect that we also have and the same goes for the merits. Here is summarized in a few words the law of the mirror: what you see in others is your reflection.





Perhaps for a long time you have wondered why a particular person behaved in a certain way with you and why that attitude was so annoying to you. Maybe you and that person are really very similar.

Once again it is a question of knowing how to accept oneself first of all in order to be able to welcome others and not only notice their defects in them. If we know first of all to recognize that we have positive qualities, we will also be able to find them in the people around us and with whom we are in contact in everyday life.

When a child comes into the world he still cannot distinguish between himself and his surroundings. He feels part of a perfect whole, of a single universe to which we then tend to lose the sense of belonging.

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Over time we understand that to recognize our identity we need to compare ourselves with other people, but we have to do it the right way. When we look in the mirror we recognize our image and we know who we are.

We may be able to see something of ourselves in others as well if we begin to consider humanity as a whole. If only we could, if we could recognize that little bit of ourselves in every other person, respect for others would stop being a problem. With the assumption that we must still learn to accept and love ourselves before being able to fully respect others without judging them on the basis of what appear to us to be defects.


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Just like when we are in front of a mirror, in fact, in front of another person we risk projecting our defects onto them. It is a phenomenon that we can define as psychological projection. This type of mechanism serves to protect us from others if we believe them to be malicious and in this case it could be really useful, but at the same time we risk projecting onto others thoughts and behaviors that do not really belong to them.

To accept and understand others better we must look inside ourselves, reflect, meditate and analyze our way of placing ourselves both towards ourselves and towards them. Maybe we are building a mask and making other people wear it but our view of their character does not correspond to the truth.

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From here can arise disputes and misunderstandings without ends why the mirror rule can duplicate itself and hold true on both sides since not only us but also others can apply it. Two very similar people and constantly looking for defects in themselves and others could easily collide.

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Once the mirror rule is fully understood, however, reversing the course becomes much easier since we realize that we can begin to observe our positive qualities to recognize them, when they are really present, also in others and above all to discover what their strengths and positive qualities are.



Interpreting the law of the mirror in the right way can help us connect with others in a deeper way and finally find a positive connection that allows us to create peaceful bridges and good relationships to build lasting relationships in every area of ​​life: in friendship, in couples, at work and beyond.

Marta Albè

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