Some bring happiness when they leave ...

Who I am
Elia Tabuenca García
@eliatabuencagarcia
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Sometimes it is made to enter our life; at first glance they seem pleasant but then, gradually, darker, less constructive sides emerge: they are the so-called "negative people", those that many define as "toxic", those who "if they leave us it is better".

Don't store avocado like this: it's dangerous

Sometimes it is made to enter our life; at first glance they seem pleasant but then, gradually, darker, less constructive sides emerge: they are the so-called "negative people", Those that many define as" toxic ", those that" if they leave us it is better ".





Paulhus Delroy area of British Columbia University has identified, for example, the triad of darkness, made up of individuals machiavellici (calculating and manipulative personalities, often passive-aggressive), narcissists (selfish and with little or no empathy, capable of hurting anyone in order to protect their self-esteem) e psychopaths (numb and devoid of feelings and emotions related to compassion).

But even coming out of the underworld of pure evil, alas, there is only the embarrassment of choice: we can meet the critics (those who do not like anything, ready to demolish with observations that have nothing constructive), i perpetually dissatisfied (who always see the glass as half empty), i victimizers, those that they blame you, the controllers, the ruthless judges, the hypergelosis, the aggressive, maybe even i bullies and abusive. And so on.

Whatever their characteristics, the first reflection to make concerns the meaning of the meeting. The truth is that nothing happens by chance and every person who "stops" - for a short or long time - in our life talks to us about us, at least he can reveal us, show us, develop something in us.

In fact, what is the effect they can produce? Make us feel wrong, undermine our self-esteem, make us feel weak, wrong, incapable, confused, guilty, victims and in general cause our vital energy to decrease, also increases our physical fatigue, clarity and mental openness. In short, they act on our physical, emotional, psychological and energetic well-being.

If it happens, however, it is only because they found in us an "opening" that allowed this to happen: it could be said that they are like coaches in the ring who, during training, hit us in full with a straight hook to the stomach and - in so doing - show us that we need to develop adequate coverage of "that area" or that we have not yet we know certain fighting techniques and tricks.



Once it is recognized and accepted that "that" relationship is not good for us (and after having detected our specific "areas of suffering"), we can finally take care of your "open area": doing a personal career path, developing talents, strengthening one's self-esteem and one's relational and social skills.

You may also be interested:

  • 10 TOXIC PEOPLE FROM WHICH WE SHOULD STAY AWAY
  • HOW TO AVOID ABSORBING NEGATIVE ENERGY FROM OTHER PEOPLE
  • AVOIDING HOSTILE AND CLASHED PEOPLE IS GOOD FOR YOUR HEALTH AND SOUL
  • 'TOXIC' AND OPPRESSIVE FAMILY: WHEN THE ENEMY IS IN THE HOUSE
  • Selfish people: 10 tips for dealing with them
  • MANIE OF PROTAGONISM: THE CAUSES AND HOW TO MANAGE EGOCENTRIC PEOPLE
  • 5 THINGS THAT THOSE WHO ALWAYS TRY TO PLEASE OTHERS SHOULD REMEMBER

At that point, even avoiding falling into the possible illusion that the other person will change (or that he will spontaneously leave), one can act accordingly within a new, more correct vision of your needs and relationship quality. The possibilities are obviously many: for example, it will be possible to reach "only" detachment, or the ability to no longer be "touched" by that person or his behavior, to strategies of "containment" and proactive management, or to take the decision to definitely separate their paths. Going away.



Whatever strategy it is, at that moment right for us, the most harmonious way to accomplish these steps is in the compassion: for oneself and for the other. Letting go of any grudge, honoring the experience made: integrating it, it becomes a treasure. A piece of one's "personal treasure" baggage.

Anna Maria Cebrelli

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