Negative emotions: how to learn to manage them and turn them into positivity

Who I am
Elia Tabuenca García
@eliatabuencagarcía

Positive emotions confirm that we are on the right track; however, the most "interesting" are negative emotions: in fact, they hide a precious treasure and can be transformed.

Do not store avocado like this: it is dangerous emotions move us; in fact, the term emotion derives from the Latin emovere, or rather to move out, to shake. This is why they are extremely precious: they become a sort of map that - bringing us a pleasant or unpleasant feeling to manage - help us understand what actions are needed to achieve our goals and be in harmony with ourselves. Positive emotions confirm that we are on the right track; the most "interesting", however, are the negative ones: in fact, they hide a precious treasure and can be transformed.

The first important thing to do is to recognize them, give the right name. It may seem trivial but for many it is not: in fact it takes an ability to "get out" at least a little from the emotional whirlwind to go and recognize exactly its characteristics.




The next step will be theacceptance: welcome that emotion and to have greater awareness of it, to see how it moves inside us, in which areas of the body we feel it, which emotional parts of us have been touched, by which external aspects we have really been stimulated. It is not at all necessary to act the emotion. Often, indeed, it can be very little constructive. But understanding it is essential.


The third step, definitely unusual in our traditional culture, is to thank - at least for a moment - thatnegative emotion: if she showed up it is not a coincidence (it never depends on the situation but, thanks to the situation, it has been able to present itself: therefore represents useful information, even if often uncomfortable).

At this point, the negative emotion can be used concretely, transforming it. According to Buddhism, there are three ways to do this. The first is to feed the "antidote".

The basic principle is that every negative emotion signals the maddition of the positive correspondent. For example, according to Antony Robbins, sadness defines a lack of happiness; disappointment refers to a lack of flexibility; anger reveals a lack of love and fulfillment. Again: frustration arises from a lack of determination; pride denounces a lack of humility; greed indicates absence of generosity; envy does not allow one to be in joy. So to counter a negative emotion, you can work to reinforce the positive one.

The second Buddhist strategy is the "liberation". The suggestion is that we can look at the negative emotion as if it were someone who comes to visit us, and have the same look for it that you have with a child who throws a tantrum: you can also understand the reasons of the child but do not let go. involve, having a broader view of what he needs and the situation, and does not give weight. This, of the "weight" is a not insignificant aspect: in fact we can strengthen, underline a negative emotion, giving it more attention. On the contrary, we can breathe it and let it go in the background, recognize its presence but not focus on it.



The third way is the "utilization”: If the emotion has a reason (and it always has), we can use it. Anger, for example, is a powerful force and can become constructive energy that supports action, gives determination and allows you to overcome any obstacle. Envy, translated in a constructive way, pushes me to commit myself concretely to those objectives that represent my authentic personal fulfillment.



The truth is that life is a kind of alchemical laboratory: we are called, every day, to turn our lead into gold; to take negative emotions and turn them into constructive energy and knowledge, growth.

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