A&I Odds

By Beachwood Reporter on Friday, April 2, 2010

For entertainment purposes only. Including gambling.

Cubs win World Series: 40-1

Uncle Lou finally gives birth: 4-1

Crane Kenney caught in sex scandal: 6-1

Pop fly lands on A-Ram's head: 6-1

Blago added to bullpen: 3-1

Uncle Lou blames injuries: 2-1

Goat sacrificed by Norwegian death metal band during guest 7th-inning stretch: 20 to 1

A zany and lovable media grandfather dies without seeing a championship: Even

Over/Under
Soriano body parts injured: 3

Average time of Lou's trips to the mound: 3 minutes

Days before disenchantment with Rudy Jaramillo sets in: 45

Soriano's average: .255

Zambrano wins: 13

Xavier Nady plate appearances: 150

Propositions
Out of division race: Before/After August 15

Out of wildcard race: Before/After September 15

First streaker: Before/After June 1

First fan jumping out of the bleachers: Before/After June 15

Raining, frogs: Before/After July 1

Raining, blood: Before/After July 2

Raining, empty beer cups: Before/After May 15

Lou slips into retirement coma: Before/After July 30

Odds of other 1969 Cubs getting statues . . .

Ron Santo: 5-1

Fergie Jenkins: 22-1

Randy Hundley: 38-1

Glenn Beckert: 50-1

Don Kessinger: 72-1

Jim Hickman: 90-1

Ken Holtzman: 100-1

Bill Hands: 125-1

Dick Selma: 133-1

Phil Regan: 142-1

Willie Smith: 150-1

Don Young: 300-1

Jimmy Qualls: 350-1

Paul Popovich: 400-1

Ken Rudolph: 500-1

Ted Abernathy: 1000-1

Posted Friday, April 2, 2010 by Beachwood Reporter
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1 Comments

Chris,
Nice touch on these articles;very clever writing. You need a lot humor to endure our Cubs year after brutal year. Good luck in your new venture. Maybe you could use your influence to blow up the entire bullpen and start over. Keep up the good work.
Tony

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